Would I let WHAT happen?!?!

So I was having a regular ol' conversation with my classmates and I was saying how I felt my dad was missing out on the obvious perk of me being a lesbian: I'm going to give my last name.

My dad has no sons. When I have kids they will have my dad's last name. That's a huge perk!

So anyway...we were talking and this boy in my class was like "how are the kids going to get your name?"

I replied "The same way my wife is: I'm giving everyone my last name."

And he was like "But you aren't getting your wife pregnant yourself."

 "No I'm not, that's what sperm banks are for" I replied.

He says " But if someone else is getting your wife pregnant, why wouldn't the kid get his last name?"

I was like "Why wouldn't my kid get the sperm donor's name?"

So clearly at this point I'm completely confused about what he's talking about. I said "We won't even know the sperm donor's actual name."

He then said "But if someone gets your wife pregnant" making a sexual gesture "would the kid get his name?"

Y'ALL He asked me this like this was a PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE question.

I responded incredulously "You mean if someone else were to have sex with my wife? Why would someone else be having sex with my wife? You do realize that's the same question as asking James's here how he would feel if another man slept with his wife right?"

And you know what, he didn't realize that. He didn't seem to understand that his question should have gotten him cussed out at the very least.

How completely disrespectful to homosexuality and to commitment! My wife is my wife. Regardless of my ability to get her pregnant, she's mine. She's committed to me. That's the beginning and the end. Under no circumstances, is sexual contact with another person acceptable.

He still didn't get it afterwards. He still didn't understand what he very clearly communicated to me: Your patriarchy and heteronormativity and the privilege associated with those, are blinding you.

The lack of a penis being involved in my sex life doesn't make less valid. I'm not going to let anyone come into marriage. The commitment I share with my wife isn't less real because I can't get her pregnant. My marriage isn't predicated on pregnancy, its based on mutual love, respect, fidelity, and devotion.

I hope most heterosexuals know better than to ask the questions I was asked and understand the commitment made in marriage is the same across gender lines.

I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine.