Don't Go

Don't Go <-- That's the sentiment I see from Alex, protege of the USWNT G.O.A.T. Abby Wambach.

I get it girl. I totally get it.

I was so incredibly proud of YiLing when she defended her PhD. I was also terrified. YiLing inspired me every day. Let me take you back.....

YiLing was the first friend I made in Omaha. Her desk was next to the one I was assigned to and I started talking to her and never stopped. She's unequivocally my grad school bestie. We were inseparable.

This is the 1st pic I ever took of her...she refused to look at the camera! 

The first time she went on a real vacation to China, she left a few weeks before I joined her in China and I got NOTHING done.

Zilch.

I was essentially non-functional in lab without her. And I was miserable. No lies, it was the worst.

Thankfully, I grew up and became a better scientist and learned how to not need her to motivate me to do actual work.....but I still needed her.

Our lab moved and YiLing didn't. Thankfully, by the time our lab was fully set up, my PI had a change of heart and brought YiLing down from Omaha and we were reunited. Honestly, me and YiLing are better together scientifically.

Though our research didn't overlap our skills did. I wrote and she did that math. Together we were genius! Over time, I learned to do more math and YiLing learned to both write in English and speak conversationally. She actually uses Black/gay slang and its most hilarious.

Then....she was ready. She was ready to defend and graduate and move into another lab across campus as a postdoc. That's where you are right now. Abby is leaving. YiLing left too. Can I tell you you'll make it? You will. There will be tears and emails and phone calls and "I miss you's" but you've had years together. I had 4 with YiLing and you've had 5+ with Abs. You'll be okay I promise.

It still brings tears to my eyes the years I spent with YiLing: The trips around the country, the road rage in Boston, our time in China on the Great Wall and in her home town, teaching her how to swim (still working on that one) and drive (she's pretty good at that now!), all the lunches served to us by her mother when she visited Omaha for 6 months, Mom picking out my clothes, our heartfelt goodbye to only be reunited a few months later in my home state, Yi's defense, bringing her to my church, the words she said about me in front of my whole church congregation about how I inspired her  to accept Jesus (tears now), her leaving the lab but not really leaving (lol) and now she's having a baby!

There will probably always be tears but they'll be happy ones. You'll still be great without her and you'll always know she walked the path with you that got you where you are today.

I know the scientist I am is in large part due to the kind of scientist YiLing is. And she's brilliant y'all. Truly.

Thanks YiLing!

Alex, you'll be okay. In fact, you'll be better because you knew her, loved her, learned from her, and grew with her.

I know I am.