I dreamed a dream

Long before I could label anything in my life I knew that my backup plan was more like my primary plan. Lots of girls had these "If we don't get married, we'll just have babies by ourselves and raise them together" plans. I actually have one with some of my friends. But you see, having that plan was always my primary plan even though my friends and I discussed it as an "if, then" situation.

Years before I connected the dots I asked a close friend what she thought of the following....

How would you feel about living together and having kids, each of us having some, and raising them together if we don't get married? We would be committed to our family and what we're doing and faithful, though we wouldn't be having sex with others, and have someone else in our kids lives of equal importance who cared about them and watched them grow up and was excited about them being conceived and all of that. What do you think of that?

Do y'all see what I just described? Essentially living in a woman-led household with two moms without the sex.  I was at the point, willing to forego sex for the commitment and loyalty of such a union. I wanted that kind of commitment with a girl.

And my friend said "Well I want the whole package. I want the sex too."

And we left it there but this was one of the first inklings that I wasn't straight.

I dreamed a dream of a house led by two women, committed to their kids and their family, vacationing together, caring for each other, being there for each other and walking out this thing called life. I dreamed the dream lesbians dream, about what could be. I just didn't know that's what the dream I was dreaming was called.

And now I do.
Now I dream that dream out loud.