Psalm 36:7-8
How priceless is your unfailing love, O God!
People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
8 They feast on the abundance of your house;
you give them drink from your river of delights.
My relationship with God has no price tag. You can't even begin to understand what it's like to have a Father who sits high and looks low if you haven't accepted salvation because its indescribable. There's not greater joy in my life than to worship Him but there's also no better place to go both in happiness and sorrow. My God isn't a small God. There's more than enough for everyone and I'm so happy to share Him with any and all who want to seek Him. Y'all come get you some!
Psalm 36:11
Let not the foot of pride overtake me, and let not the hand of the wicked drive me away
Its vital to remember that I have done nothing. Nothing is my level of personal capability. It is through Christ Jesus that I have done all things notable and good. Proverbs says "Pride goeth before the fall" and I'm oh so careful not to let pride be a part of my life. I have nothing to boast on except the favor of God. Under my power no good thing is done and under His, all good things come to pass. In all things I acknowledge Him. I'm sure my graduate school department had never seen a picture of Jesus on the cross at the end of a dissertation defense but He was right there in mine. I needed to be as clear as water. Jesus. That's it. Just Jesus.
Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.
Make your humble petition to the Lord and then praise Him like its already done. <---This is the modus operandi I'm trying to walk in. Faith requires exercise. I have been faithful over a few things like studying and I needed God to make the difference and He has so many times. The thing I love about God is that He gives you the secret desires too. All those years ago when I prayed for a husband, the Lord knew I was praying for companionship. He knew that I wasn't even made to have a husband but He heard my secret petition. And that prayer went unanswered.....or did it? The Lord heard what I was really saying with my heart despite the words my mouth said. Now this isn't always the case but I think the secret petitions part is so important. I'm praying a huge prayer right now and the time I spend delighting in the Lord gives me even more faith. I'm telling you....fast secular music just for a week and see if it doesn't change you. I'm listening to "Jesus, Keep Me Near the Cross" as I type this. Listen.....it'll change you.
Psalm 37:5
Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.
Long ago I decided I wanted to do things God's way. Can I tell you a decision isn't the same as an action. Its taken many moons for me to actually walk this out but its such a blessing. Trusting Him has been an amazing walk because you can look at situations and say "BUT GOD!" You know that thing you didn't think would work out and did? That's God. He'll do it especially when He knows that your heart is inclined to Him and you'll be a mouthpiece for Him. I love telling folks "God did it. It wasn't me. I simply said Father I stretch my hand to thee. No other help I know and He made a way."
Psalm 37:7a
Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him;
I was so struck by the idea of Be still. Being still is hard. I always want to do something to affect change but sometimes all God wants in stillness. All He wants is for you to rely completely on Him to bring something to pass. Another place this often manifests for me is in prayer. Stillness in prayer can seem like doing nothing but actually you're exactly where you need to be to hear His voice. God speaks to me all the time but I've found its when my mind is completely blank. The Lord loves a good shower conversation with me personally. Its when I'm not seeking Him actively but have demonstrated an attitude and a posture of wanting to hear from Him that He drops in my spirit like a stone in water. Resting in Him is also essential. I can come out of all my stuff if I just offer myself up to worship. Worship is a place where you can go to get all your needs met.
Psalm 37:23-24
The steps of a [good] man are directed and established by the Lord when He delights in his way [and He busies Himself with his every step].
Though he falls, he shall not be utterly cast down, for the Lord grasps his hand in support and upholds him
The way I walk is my own. Its been predestined and ordained for me. It may not look like yours but its just as right for me as yours is for you. Having gone to grad school first is God's plan for me. Though many say "what's the point of getting a degree you don't want to use" I'm here to say its my journey. Its my walk and sometimes its better to travel than to arrive. I'm so grateful to be who I am walking into this medical school season because I know so much more about who I am what I believe, and what I know to be right in my spirit. Grad school afforded me time to do a whole lot of work on myself that I never would have had if I'd gone straight to medical school. This is the way I needed to walk.
I also think its important to know that on that walk, I've stumbled. I've fallen often but that great hymn of Zion that says "Father I stretch my hand to thee" has been my truth and my prayer for years. I love that here in the scripture of my faith its clear that God condemns me not but grasps my outstretched hand and supports me. I'm His child and my wellbeing is His greatest desire.
Psalm 37:25
I have been young and now am old, yet have I not seen the [uncompromisingly] righteous forsaken or their seed begging bread.
Never. Never ever ever have I seem the righteous forsaken. I've never seen it. As my sister and I would say "Its not a thing" cause it ain't. God's faithfulness is unending as is His tender mercies unto us.
Psalm 37:39
But the salvation of the [consistently] righteous is of the Lord; He is their Refuge andsecure Stronghold in the time of trouble.
He's my hiding place. He's always there in times of trouble. He was right there on the highway with me as I drove with my Queens to bury 5 members of a fellow Queen's family. You might say how? How can God allow this and you still believe on Him, trust in Him, and seek Him for everything? No other help do I know. God can use anything and any situation for His glory. It isn't my job to understand. Its my job to trust. It is in time if complete lack of understanding that you have to know God is doing something and I just need to hold on. Wait on Him y'all.
Psalm 38:4
For my iniquities have gone over my head [like waves of a flood]; as a heavy burden they weigh too much for me.
I've been saved a long time but even the brief times I've let my sins fester and not confessed them and received the blood of Jesus which washes away all things and makes me brand new before a holy God, I've been in this place. The burden of trying to be good for the same of God as opposed to under the power and influence of the Holy Spirit is too much. You will fail and your failure will paralyze you. You'll realize you will never been good enough, right enough, brave enough, smart enough. There isn't anything you'll ever be enough at under your own power. But Jesus, allowing the Father's will over His own, died on a cross and experienced separation from God so that we wouldn't ever have to carry our own sins. The work is finished y'all. If you've got a burden, hand that over because its null and void. You're making yourself sick. God has already provided the medication.
Psalm 38:15
For in You, O Lord, do I hope; You will answer, O Lord my God.
My hope is in the Lord. My prayers will be answered. That doesn't mean the answer will be what I want but there will be a response. That's the thing about the veil being torned. You can go right to God and ask. The hard part is walking out some of those answers. But I'd like to just say....when you get answer you don't heed, you've just chosen to walk away from God's direct words for you and that is the definition of crazy. I'm not about that life at all!
Psalm 38:21
Forsake me not, O Lord; O my God, be not far from me.
Having a close relationship with the Lord propels me into my day. Without Him, I don't know what I would do. The Lord can be as close as you will permit Him and trust me....I'm always like " Jesus keep me directly under the cross" not near it. Under it. I need to be that close. I need to be able to touch the hem of His garment. No games, I need Him.
Psalm 39:7
And now, Lord, what do I wait for and expect? My hope and expectation are in You
I hope not on things that I hear or see. My hope is built on nothing less....than Jesus blood and righteousness. I know y'all are tired of these hymns but the hymns of my youth have brought me so much joy in my adulthood. I use to think the old ways were just that but if you let these words work on your heart you too will cry in under 30 seconds of Near the Cross. Listen....don't begrudge the Lord your tears. He's worthy y'all. I am yet waiting for revelation on the things I've prayed for and hoping they come to pass. What did I tell y'all yesterday about waiting.....It'll do a number on you. It'll also show you His faithfulness and His sustaining power in the in-between times.
Psalm 40:4
Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his refuge and trust, and turns not to the proud or to followers of false gods
When He's where you go, there is no forsaking and no too busy. Jesus is always on call. He's always available and He's already fixed it. But you have to remember it was Him not YOU! It was God that fixed it. Nothing you did influenced that situation to go your way. God did that for you. Don't act like you don't know!
Psalm 40:8
I delight to do Your will, O my God; yes, Your law is within my heart.
God's will not mine. God's will be done in my life for it is far better than anything I can ask or imagine. Sometimes the best I can do is to want to want to do His will though and that's okay. Sometimes that's where you are and being honest about it builds your relationship with Him. I've been there. I've wanted to want to do His will but I didn't want it for real. There's grace for that. Grace abounding. Again though...walking away from God for me amounts to literal loss of mental ability so I've had to sit with that and with Him until He helped me do better.
I hide the word in my heart but I also act according to His law. For me the biggest one is love. God is Love and his law is Love. When I act out of anything but Love, I find that I'm not counted among the upright because I can feel the absence of God's inspiration in my actions. Course correction needed STAT! Oh God, my God, my great Jehovah, be ye ever guiding me along this journey to Glory. Amen.
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