I Know the Lord Will Make a Way

Last night I was talking to one of my mentors and we were talking about how God doesn't need any help from us and its so true. The creator doesn't need anything from me. He may require an exercise of faith but that's for me to build my relationship with Him. He isn't relying on my prayers or fasting to move. He can do anything He wants whenever He wants. If its His will, He can move mountains, bring you from Namibia to DC, or cause you to be with child despite what the odds looked like. God, who stepped out on nothing and created everything, can do anything without a single prayer or thought from me. The actions I go through draw me closer to Him, but that's for relationship not for action.
God is.
God can.
God will.
God does.

Psalm 121: 2-3

My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.

He will not allow your foot to slip or to be moved; He Who keeps you will not slumber.

I'm going to tell you that I didn't look at the passage I was about to write about before I just copied and pasted it. I love how God will do that. How you'll have something on your spirit and then He'll drop that verse right in your life. He's so God that way. The truth though is that my help only comes from the Lord. On so many occasions, I've been in desperate need of Him and He's always on time. My latest conversations come into mind when I think about God. You know when someone is placed right there in your life for you to get it together and you know its God? I've felt like that deep within me the last few days. Some people are literally your ram in the bush. God hasn't let me go yet and He's not about to. God's not about that life. He's so faithful and always on time. 

Psalm 122:1

I was glad when they said to me, Let us go to the house of the Lord!

I love worship. That's obvious. But you know what God did for me in college? He have me a love for going to church. I was not a child who liked to go to church. I was great once I got that but I never wanted to go. I went to college and quite literally, the only place I felt at home was church. Church was my refuge because the God I'd always known and accessed was there. For a long time I had a Sunday relationship with God until I learned to worship and usher in His presence for myself. I really learned that in choir because that same feeling I got at church was right there in the room. That's the presence of God. 

The other great thing about church is community. You find community at church. You find people who are like minded at church, who believe what you believe and seek after what you seek. There's something so encouraging about knowing other people are on the same path you're on. One of the first things I'm looking for in Maryland is a church home. Honestly, I already think I've found one. I've gotten such great teaching and instruction from my mentors, one of which is Baptist and open to the fact that God made me a homosexual, and I found a beautiful Black Baptist church up there that's affirming as well and I think its going to be the one. I find it so important to go to an affirming church because I need to be able to be honest at church. I can't go into church, a place where truth and love exist, and not be able to fulling enter with the totality of who I am. I don't want to change pronouns and pretend to be someone I'm not. Ironically, this is the denomination of my father, though I've always going to my mother's church. He's low key pleased about it too even though he doesn't know why I decided on this church. I also got an amazing sermon there that was just for me. I love how God will do that. He's so amazing.

Psalm 122:9

For the sake of the house of the Lord our God, I will seek, inquire for, and require your good.

The house of the Lord isn't the building. The Lord dwells within us. This verse really speaks to me about intercessory prayer. I've been in that posture for so long so I'm tickled God dropped this in here in a time when its the reality of my life. He does that you know.....gives you exactly what you need. Stuff like that is so clearly God speaking directly to me and I'm so humbled by that reality. 

This verse is really saying to me that for the sake of the Body of Christ, I need to seek God for your benefit. As a person who is somewhere farther along on the maturity of relationship with God sliding scale, I have a responsibility to behave as like I really know Him. I know Him in the core of who I am and that relationship is a gift. Its also very clearly brings into focus that to whom much is given, much is required. I've got a level of responsibility thats higher, requiring my obedience to the Spirit because I have very clear evidence that God is because He is in my own life.  I've got to go before God for a multitude of people who can't go for themselves and I'm not saying anything about who I am but who God is within me. He drops people into my spirit all the time and I'm like "Oh ok. That's the direction you want me to pray in. Got it." Intercessory prayer is such a gift but its also a very serious faith walk. I'm believing God, not for myself where I'm going to have clear and present and timely evidence of His presence, but for you? I can't see what He's doing in your life but I believe Him for it and that's a supernatural astoundingly beautiful but difficult faith walk. I'm so thankful that I know the God that moves in my life and moved in David's, Joshua's, and Job's, is the same God moving in yours. 

Psalm 124:8

Our help is in the name of the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.

In His name alone do I find strength. In His name alone am I comforted. I actually say "Jesus" all the time. I say it so much at work. Anytime anything needs to go a little less left or a little less right, I'm right there calling on Jesus. And you know what? Now other people in my lab, non-believers, say Jesus too. They call on Him in times of distress. What they don't realize is that saying "Jesus" is a whole prayer in and of itself. They may not believe in Him, but they surely are calling on Him! 

Psalm 125:1

Those who trust in, lean on, and confidently hope in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which cannot be moved but abides and stands fast forever.

This goes back to the nature of who God is for me. He's the tree planted by the water. God isn't going anywhere. He abides. I love that word and I use it in relationships. Abiding....ever present, stead fasting. Those words so accurately describe my walk with God. He's always there. Even when He isn't giving me what I want when I want it, He's right there with me in the waiting. Never has He been closer to me than when I wasn't getting admitted to medical school. I couldn't understand it because I knew He was there but I felt He wasn't moving on my behalf. That was me forgetting that my thoughts are the thoughts of God and nothing I'll ever think will ever be on the same plane as Him. He was ever present because He knew the thing He'd put in my heart wasn't going to come to pass when I wanted it and I needed Him every step of the way. I wish I'd exercised more faith in that time but I'm so thankful that when I do turn to something, its so often Him. I'm working on making it always Him.

Psalm 125:4

Do good, O Lord, to those who are good, and to those who are right [with You and all people] in their hearts

Its so vital to check your heart which for me means check my intentions. I've got to make sure that my heart is pure and upright. If its not, I've got some work to do. The Lord looks at the heart. Even if you don't get your action right, was your motivation appropriate? I'm constantly checking in because my relationship with God causes me to quite literally be uncomfortable when I'm not. Its like a tightening in my chest. Yes, I have physical manifestations of discomfort when something's not right. For me anything that brings about confusion or is confusing feels awful because God isn't a God of confusion. If confusion is found, that's not God. I've got to recalibrate and get it together. I've got to find the truth and the truth is always clean and walk that out in my life. God rewards the attitudes of our hearts. He also gives us the desires there in that line up with His will. Don't you want your heart to me right when He looks at you? I sure do.