God is like this on infinity. He's done it. The work of the Cross is finished, He's constantly after us if we belong to Him, and His level of devotion to us is unparalleled. I try to model my relationships after God's example. I fail miserably, but I'm trying. He's so gracious with me in my efforts.
Isaiah 56:6
Also the foreigners who join themselves to the Lord to minister to Him and to love the name of the Lord and to be His servants, everyone who keeps the Sabbath so as not to profane it and who holds fast My covenant [by conscientious obedience]—
All these I will bring to My holy mountain and make them joyful in My house of prayer. Their burnt offerings and their sacrifices will be accepted on My altar; for My house will be called a house of prayer for all peoples. My job is nothing but foreigners. I'm the only American student that's stayed in my lab more than 4 years and the first to ever get a PhD. Americans just don't fare well in my lab BUT God because I can tell you I'm definitely not the smartest American they've tried to hire but I am making it out! <---Won't He do it!?!?! Anyway....my lab is foreign. My best friend of 6 years, YiLing, came to know Christ in the last two years. When I think back about how she asked me "Why do you give money at church? What do they give you?" my first year of graduate school I know it was nothing but God that brought her this far. She would tell you that my witness played a huge role in her interest but I'd tell you what witness? I never tried to convince YiLing or really even talked to her a whole lot specifically about becoming a Christian. All I talked about was being one. She would often ask me "How can you be so happy when your committee is upset/your data isn't good/you're failing classes?" and I'd say "Jesus." I just had this perspective that nothing was more important than God and I wasn't going to let these impossible classes steal my joy. I just was NOT! Anyway, YiLing stood up in my home church 1.5 years ago and told them that it was my witness that made her try Jesus. I cried like a baby. If the only reason I got this PhD was so that she could come to know Christ, its enough. That right there is enough.
Isaiah 57:15
For thus says the high and lofty One—He Who inhabits eternity, Whose name is Holy: I dwell in the high and holy place, but with him also who is of a thoroughly penitent and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble and to revive the heart of the thoroughly penitent [bruised with sorrow for sin]
God dwells in heaven. So does the sinner. The cross made my inheritance possible. Without the cross no one but God and the angels would dwell in heaven. My blood drenched soul is white as snow to a holy and righteous God. The Blood of Jesus speaks through eternity on my behalf. But what I love about this is that it talks about have a thoroughly penitent spirit. I think sometimes I want to be forgiven for sins I've committed against God well before I'm ready. The thing about sin is that you have to actually feel bad about what you're doing. His forgiveness is unquestionable and my salvation isn't in question, but like any relationship, when you wrong God you have to make it right. Just like sometimes I want to want the will of God, I also sometimes want to feel badly but I honestly don't. I've found that the closer my walk is to Him, the more quickly I'm convicted of things I shouldn't be doing. Being convicted still isn't the same as being sorry or my behavior though. There are things I've still not asked for forgiveness about because I'm still not sorry. I'm working it. He's working on me.
Isaiah 57:16
For I will not contend forever, neither will I be angry always, for [if I did stay angry] the spirit [of man] would faint and be consumed before Me, and [My purpose in] creating the souls of men would be frustrated
God has a purpose and a plan and His anger against us for the things we have done won't accomplish that. He quite literally is saying that His purpose in creating us wouldn't be achieved if there wasn't a way to reconcile our sin nature with His Holiness. That reconciliation is Jesus. God knew He'd have to send Jesus. He's been talking about sending Jesus since the beginning because He knew we'd need a sacrifice, a sufficient one, to be in right standing with Him. I'm so thankful that He made us anyway, knowing we'd cost so much to be in relationship with. I'm also so humbled that He wanted a relationship with me at all. I mean seriously? Who am I? He say's I'm His beloved.
Isaiah 57:19
Peace, peace, to him who is far off [both Jew and Gentile] and to him who is near! says the Lord; I create the fruit of his lips, and I will heal him [make his lips blossom anew with speech in thankful praise].
At the end of my prayers I close them out with "May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, Oh Lord my strength and my Redeemer. In Jesus Christ name do I pray." I think there's power in words. Lord knows, I write quite a bit. I also think there's something about what you say. In my prayer life, I find that the fruit of my lips, the things my heart wants to say, aren't cerebral. They aren't necessarily things I even think about during the day. The things I offer in prayer tho....so far beyond what I'd consider saying in general. The fruit of my lips in prayer...not always me. I'm much more of meek spirit in prayer sometimes that I'd ever be when I'm not on my knees. Prayer brings me such peace. I've found that even when the situation remains unchanged, peace still prevails when I let the truth of who He is wash over me. He's faithful. I'm not always ready to let Him do that but when I am, He's faithful.
So I've struggled with whether or not to publish my thoughts on the next scripture. I know I'm supposed to write about these verses. I read them last night, once, twice, three times, and then I got on my knees like Lord, Really? I just want to preface this by saying that this particular section of scripture speaks directly to death and it undeniably brought to my mind thoughts of Amanda.
Isaiah 57:1-2
The righteous man perishes, and no one lays it to heart; and merciful and devout men are taken away, with no one considering that the uncompromisingly upright and godly person is taken away from the calamity and evil to come [even through wickedness].
He [in death] enters into peace; they rest in their beds, each one who walks straight andin his uprightness.
I didn't know her that well. I didn't really know her at all. She was, however, my love's best friend. She was friends with all my friends from Hampton that call Atlanta home. Those ATLiens roll deep! My friends are going through it with the loss of one of the key players of their group. Had I lost someone so close to me, I'm not at all sure how I'd receive the above scripture. I'm sure I'd be like "Get out of my face with that!" I'm offering this as humbly as I know how.
Can I offer that whatever was going on in her life was so painful that the only recourse she felt she had was to literally be with the Father? That she knew there was no hurt heaven could not heal? And that He received her with exceedingly great joy because she belonged to Him and believed Him? That's the truth of scripture. The truth I see is that she inherited the Kingdom of God and with it peace. It's indisputable. I may not have known her well but I've seen that girl worship. Her worship was for real. I realize that this does nothing for those who knew and loved her except assure them that she's fine. I think knowing that is valuable even if it doesn't help with the hurt my love feels.
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